154,200 pushups completed
845,800 pushups to go
4,693 pushups ahead of schedule
Greetings blog fans! Here are a few very stupid things a person can do:
- Step on Superman's cape
- Start a land war in Asia
- Spit into the wind
- Throw an 0-2 change-up out over the plate
- "Trial and error" home electrical repairs
- Have a weight loss contest with Jon Swadley
I went first.
178.5 lbs! That's 11.5 lbs of weight loss in 18 days. I've been practically starving myself, skipping meals, running multiple times per day, when I do eat it's mostly fruits / veggies / chicken, only skim milk in my coffee, freshly clipped fingernails and toenails... doing everything I could to cut weight. And I was happy with my results.
Then Swadley went...
167.5 lbs. 12.5 lbs of weight loss, and he claims to not have been trying too hard until the last week.
So it looks like I owe him 3 hours of yard work.
The rest of this blog will be dedicated to how Swadley could have cheated.
TOP TEN WAYS THAT JON SWADLEY CHEATS AT WEIGHT LOSS CONTESTS
10. Has a mouse in his pocket (initial weigh in only)
9. Mexican diuretics
8. Cries himself to sleep each night, causing severe dehydration
7. Kardashian brand posterior implants (initial weigh in only)
6. Bone shaving
5. Shaved backhair between weigh ins.
4. Has a mouse in his other pocket (initial weigh in only)
3. Did ten pushups once. Never again.
2. New Merkt's cheese with negative caloric content (Jon works for Merkt's, the port wine cheese people)
1. Eats less, exercises more
What was this blog about again? Pushups? OH yeah, I have been pushin' them out like Salt N Pepa.
Check my stats above. Ah. Push it.
Peace Out,
Thunder John
Bringin the thunder, packin' the pain, loaded with pushups - makin' it rain!
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