83,000 pushups completed
917,000 pushups to go
2,222 ahead of schedule.
Greetings pushups fans. Thunder John here. You, there. A lot's been happening since my last posting. Let me bring you up to speed.
First off, did something I've always wanted to do. I ate some Dannon (fruit on the bottom) yogurt a full three days past expiry. Nothing happened. Yogurt cops did not knock down my door. Empowered by my act of rebellion, I taped and distributed a broadcast of the Cubs game without the express written permission of Major League Baseball. Again nothing happened. I later ate an unwashed apple. Nada. This puts in doubt every warning my mother had ever burdened me with. Should I go cross the street with my eyes closed and see what happens? Eat the candy of a stranger? Spit directly into the wind? Never again trust an Irishman? Suppose I've got a few things to figure out on my own now.
No time for that now though; life moves fast and TJ isn't gonna wait on the sidelines. Last Sunday I went to New York City for business for three days. It was the Society of Actuaries Annual Meeting near Times Square. Actuaries are just really great people on the whole, there's no two ways about it. Great with numbers. Really like following the rules. Conversation can be challenging. But if you're ever going to buy a used car from somebody and they tell you they're an actuary, chances are you're getting a square deal.
Fast Fact: In A New York Minute, Thunder John can perform 71 pushups.
Actuaries use the left side of their brain a lot in their jobs; this is the analytical side that likes to crunch numbers, use logic, follow a chain of causation, etc. The right side, the side of creativity is not always that important for actuarial work. I tried taking guitar lessons to keep my right brain from getting flabby, but that was a disaster. So writing this blog, a "creative writing" exercise, is how I am currently trying to keep my brain balanced. Not sure how it's going so far, so please, provide some constructive criticism via the comments section on this blog.
Where was I... oh yeah so my arms are getting huge, my brain is perfectly balanced and I can't play the guitar. I'm ready for the rapture. What more could a person want? Well now that I'm what Dr. Maslow would call "self actualized", it's my duty to help you the faithful blog follower achieve your own muscular samsara. Let me continue to tell my tale:
While in NYC, I decided to stretch my legs and go for a walk. Below you can see me striking a familiar pose in front of the Ed Sullivan Theatre, home of The Late Show with David Letterman. Note the finger blocking the bottom of the picture. It is so hard to find a competent homeless person to take your picture, so instead a work colleague snapped my visage. Maybe I should've went with the NY vagabond instead.
Afterward I went around the corner and had a sandwich at the Hello Deli!, ordering from Rupert himself (Rupert often appears on the Late Show). In honor of the visit, here are the
Top Ten Reasons to Support the Thunder John Pushups Blog:
10. If the Dancing Baby can go viral, then every day I'm under 1,000,000 page visits is a slap in the face.9. Reading this blog will make you feel better about the way you spend YOUR free time (except for the time you spend reading this blog)
8. Have you read that guy with the situps blog? Pathetic!7. My kids college savings plan relies heavily on you clicking the banner ads.
6. The ten millionth page viewer will win... a brand new car*!
5. Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups. He does Earth-downs. Sorry. Wrong list but I thought it was funny.
4. What, you don't think there's any useful information in this blog, it's all just a bunch of self serving pablum? Well then, here's a tip to prevent body odor: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyTn_m4oMww
3. I told everybody at work that my blog is really popular. Please don't make me a liar.
2. Thunder John is the 21st century's first true American hero (I'd like to be played by Ryan Reynolds or Andre Agassi in the movie version of this story).
And the #1 reason to support the Thunder John blog is:
1. You need an outlet for the energy you were channeling into freeing the Chilean miners. This blog is your answer.
Peace out,Thunder John
"Bringin' the thunder, packin' the pain, loaded with pushups, makin' it rain"
* - brand new car promotion has been cancelled
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